The WSFA Journal


February 1991

ISSN 0894-2

Presidents Kick Curpals

Constitutional Questions Dominate Debate ........ Page 2
WSFA Matchmakers Meet ........................... Page 4
First Brother Visits WSFA ....................... Page 5
Through Darkest Resnick with Gun and Camera ..... Page 7
Eve of Destruction .............................. Page 7
Dune: An Early Draft ............................ Page 8
Where Will It Stop?.............................. Page 8
Twins Reunited .................................. Page 9
Treasurer's Report ............................. Page 10
Eclecticon 13 .................................. Page 12


First Friday in January

The First Friday in January meeting convened at 9:17 p.m., 4 January 1991. President Tom Schaad noted that this was the first meeting of the New Year.

In view of the economic obsession gripping the nation since the "other President" (George Bush) said the R-word, the real President, Tom Schaad called for a Treasurer's Report first. Treasurer Bob MacIntosh cheerfully reported that we had $7748.05 in the kitty. He reminded us that dues are due and payable since voting membership dues are on a Calendar Year basis, not a Disclave Year basis. Non-voting associate members are allowed bread and circuses at WSFA's expense but no voice in running the organization.

Having put it off as long as he could, Tom then called on Secretary Lee Strong for a Publications Committee Report. Lee asked "What better way to ring in the New Year but with a new WSFA Journal?" Lee then unveiled the Journal's new, pro looking logo and cover. The club Oooh'd in admiration. Lee asked Matt Leger to take a bow for designing the new cover.

Joe Mayhew noted that the ISSN number was incorrectly given as an ISBN (book) number. And Hal Haag corrected the spelling of his name: he is not biologically related to Dan Hoey.

Doll Gilliland, President of the Entertainment Committee and noted literary expert, congratulated our sterling editor for a sterling Journal. (Thanks, Doll, but actually I'm an alexandria editor.)

Doll further announced that the Air and Space Museum was showing SF films during January. They are Star Wars, The Day the Earth Stood Still, Short Circuit, and Westworld.

The Kennedy Center American Film Institute will show Cyberpunk the movie Monday and Tuesday, 28-29 January. There will be time for a theater party. Stay on the Net.

Disclave Past Chairfan Eva Whitley has turned over information on WSFA Press' Mike Resnick book to President Schaad, who anticipates publication in the February 1991 WSFA Journal. See pages 10-11.

Covert Beach, speaking for Disclave Present, noted that virtual reality was A Big Thing these days. Accordingly, Disclave 1991 Chairfan Peggy Rae Pavlat declared that now was "virtual 1990". As a result, Disclave 1991 memberships could be purchased for 1990's prices ($20). From now until 30 April 1991, the price is $25. From 1 May 91 until Memorial Day, the price will be $30. After Memorial Day, a complimentary Disclave '91 membership will be included with the purchase of a Disclave '92 membership. Two Disclaves for the price of one!

The club remained in awestruck silence following this report. Mike Zipser stated that the club was confused by such coherence.

Covert announced that the Disclave '91 origami party would be held at the Third Friday in February. Fold early, fold often.

Steven Fetheroff, Treasurer of Disclave '91, asked for $3000 for a book. Before a vote could be taken, it was pointed out that only 7 people had voting memberships at present and that this was less than quorum strength. Several ingenious parliamentary devices were proposed and shot down. Despite the fact that having only 7 voters greatly simplified debate, Tom called a recess to allow people the opportunity to become voters. The meeting recessed at 9:29.

During the recess, a rush to the Treasurer's corner ensued. Also, Mr. John Smith, President of Vice, annoyed the ladies.

The meeting reconvened at 9:41 with a quorum of 23 voting members. Steven's motion was taken up and approved 22-1, W. Guthrie Moore dissenting. Disclave 1991 is authorized a $3000 line of credit from the WSFA account for the purpose of publishing a WSFA Press book.

Steven "F" also stated that he loved Eva "W". Jack "C" was out of the conference room at the time.

Disclave Future Chairfan Steven sent letters to the GOHs. Now that it's the New year, it's time to start thinking and planning and stuff. The club gave an Oooh of dread at the thought. Talk to Steven after the meeting.

John Pomeranz, Chairfan of the Committee to Spend a Great Deal of Money on Something in Incredibly Bad Taste, announced that he had a new jacket from Mom. The club Oooh'd in appreciation. The Committee was concerned about the possibility of chemical and biological warfare in the Persian Gulf. In an effort to deter possible misadventures, the Committee is sending a truly appropriate deterrent to the area: the Exxon Valdez has set sail for the Gulf.

John also exposed his purchase of a book of "primitive art". Cultural arbitrator Joe Mayhew reviewed the book and announced that he was grossed out. The club applauded Joe admitting it. The editorial staff of The WSFA Journal reviewed this work and Immediately announced that it will not be appearing in The WSFA Journal. If this art doesn't violate the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, it certainly violates the Eighth Amendment. (Chew on that one, Constitution groupies!)

There was no Old or New Business conducted.

New Tradition: Tom asked if there were any first timers at WSFA. Pat Pending came forward to meet WSFA. The club shouted "Hi, Pat!"

Fred Ator and Laurie Racetrack were our only second timers. There were no three times. Susan Cohen asked if anyone was here for his or her last time. Apparently, everyone will come again.


Mike Walsh announced that he is on drugs from the Wilmer Eye Clinic. Rowdie Yates asked if he was selling them for $1 per bottle. No, allowed Mike, but he was selling books in competition with Joe Mayhew and A Person to be Named Later. Jack Chalker challenged Mike to a eye drug duel. Shall we see who wins?

Matt Leger has, returned from deep south Louisiana. His New Orleans friends had some unkind words for the Worldcon Bid Committee. A representative of the Permanent Floating Worldcon Committee sneered.

Matt also announced that the new Journal logo was done in MacIntosh Canvas software.

Jack Chalker again plugged the Harlan Ellison Pornbook. "Two decades in the making," rhapsodized Mike. Publishing Harlan Ellison can be dangerous to your vision.

Susan announced that Eclecticon XIII (Tom Jewell turns 30) will be held on 9 Feb 91. See the flier on page 12 of this issue of The WSFA Journal.

Kitt announced that one of her little jewelie critters had wandered off. The critter has no name and closely resembles an elaborate earring.

Dan Burgess announced that he had received a no fault divorce. He is moving to a new domicile tomorrow.

Mel Scharadin solicited help in identifying two old swords that turned up at her house.

Erica Van Dommelen announced nice prints that are looking for new homes. Karl and Jailbait are sick.

Vicky Smith has become house-owned. She will single handedly reverse the local real estate market decline.

Lance Oszko, Polish Ambassador to WSFA, announced that you, too, can earn small bucks carrying Gdansk SF art to conventions. Get your 10% commission by contacting Lance at (703) 823-0514.

Joe Mayhew announced that he is selling books in competition with Mike Walsh and A Person to be Named Later. He is selling 7 Ray Bradburies for $5. "The ones you got for free?" asked Rowdie.

Terilee Edwards-Hewitt announced that her New Pfalz English teacher is in the H. P. Lovecraft memorial book. If he spells "falls" with a "P" and a "z", he can't be very good.

Steven Vaughan-Nichols has quit his mundane job. There's enough money in writing and the mutual funds to support him in a fannish manner.

The Person to be Named Later announced that he was selling books in competition with Mike and Joe. Unfortunately, the Secretary forgot his name, so look for people with books. [See page 7.]

The meeting unanimously adjourned at 9:55.


WSFA Matchmakers' Committee

Chairfan Karl Ginter convened the committee following the regular business session. Most of the meeting was devoted to interviewing "The Unknown Single".

Miss Single is looking for a male human being, heterosexual, Judaic-accepting, cat-loving, interested in marriage and children. He must be intelligent (IQ 130+, but not limited to rocket scientists), warm, caring, and appreciate Dan Quayle jokes (including the one about the bat). Height, weight and vision are neutral factors but good grooming is a must. He must bathe regularly whether he wants to or not. Dislikes include country & western, heavy metal and rap "music"; smoking; drinking to excess; chauvinists; or bigots generally. Republicans accepted with proper references.

Miss Single would be interested in previously committed men, but would feel uncomfortable about previous children.

Potential applicants should have bank statements/credit references and medical records available for inspection by parents.

Submit potential candidates to Ginter & Floozie Associates, podunk, MD. (If he's an M.D., all the better.)


The Third Friday in January meeting convened at 9:16, 18 January, 1991. "Day Three of Desert Storm," announced President and Commander in Chief Tom Schaad.

Tom asked Secretary Lee Strong, who just returned from        , to check on the minutes of the last meeting. Lee glanced inside the official WSFA Journal file folder and pronounced the minutes to be excellent. Tom was once again nonplussed. Lee moved that the club waive the reading of the minutes. Tom announced that Lee was not that moving. Susan Cohen graciously moved waiving the reading and the motion was adopted, Covert Beach dissenting.

Tom directed that the Secretary take Covert's name. Lee asked what he was supposed to do with the taken name. Tom said, "Anything you want to."

Treasurer Bob MacIntosh reported that WSFA had $7873.05 in the Treasury. However, $3000 was obligated to Disclave '91 for a book. There is only $4873.05 available for fun and games. Someone proposed to have a party. Joe Mayhew proposed WSFA take over Delaware. Dupont probably won't sell.

Alexis Gilliland, Vice President of the Entertainment Committee, reported 2 items. First, only three people signed up to see Cyberpunk the movie at the American Film Institute. This is not enough for a theater party.

Second, it is well known that certain words, such as 'purple' and 'orange', do not have rhymes. After diligent research, literary expert Doll Gilliland determined that 'curpal', a Scottish word for 'buttocks', rhymes with 'purple'. The club applauded this literary breakthrough. Onward to 'orange'!

Disclave Past           .

Disclave Present Chairfan Peggy Rae Pavlat announced that her sister-in-law had been ill but that that was no longer a problem as she had died the previous Monday. The club oooh'd in sorrow. On a lighter note, Disclave Programming is coming along just fine. Twenty-two beings are certainly coming. ______ put together a draft flyer. Where the department heads had not provided information, he cheerfully wrote lies about you. (I'll bet they're not as good as our lies!) He hopes to mail before the postal rot increase.

Steven Fetheroff reported that the Disclave '91 book is changing. Stories by Lewis Shiner and interior art by Alicia Austin. Can we traumatize Peggy Rae?

Peggy Rae posed the idea of doing Disclave '91 mugs for about $2.50 per mug. Previously, Disclave mugs were made as thank yous for the staff. These would be money-makers. T-shirts were another possibility. Tom had a idea... [No comment.] ...but refused to discuss it in public. [No comment.]

______ announced that origami will be performed at the next meeting. When you read this, it's too late: you're drafted!

The Zipsers are still seeking programming ideas.

Disclave Yet to Come Chairfan Steven Fetheroff said, "Hi!" He usually is. The club said, "Hi!" back. We often are. As a novelty, Steven discussed some convention business: Pat Cadigan will be GOH while Tom Kidd is first choice for Art GOH. The 1992 WSFA Press plans to publish an all original book.

The Committee to Spend a Great Deal of Money on Toys and Games was not present. Is John at a movie? Dan Hoey theorized that John couldn't compete with the spectacle offered by Desert Storm: a 98 pound "wimp" kicking sand in a bully's face.

Old Business:

New Business: Kent Bloom stated that the Bloom/Morman home would not be available next month due to raids by the pirates of Boskone, or something like that. Commander Schaad stated that he would be off (attending to Boskone) and he appointed Steve Smith, Vice President, to re-position and chair the Third Friday in February meeting. "At Steve's house?" shuddered one member.

Lance Oszko announced that he will have a suite at Balticon on the date of the next Fifth Friday. He invited the club to hold the Fifth Friday meeting there. The club accepted. "It'll be a Good Friday," punned Joe Mayhew. "Stop them before they pun again," pleaded Tom.

New Tradition. Our befuddled President forgot about the tradition that he is trying to introduce. Fortunately, our insubordinate Secretary took the opportunity to embarrass Tom once again.

Tom then introduced his brother, Lech "Fred" Pilsudski, visiting WSFA for the first time. Lech is now a USAir pilot. In a touching display of brotherly affection, Tom recounted how he stuck Lech with the dinner bill. For further details on Lech's previous career, see the Features section on page 9 of The WSFA Journal.

Other first timers were Jo Ann Packer, Genara Egbert At Your Service, and Genara's husband, Keith Egbert At Your Service. "We're strange," allowed Tom, obviously speaking for himself, "but, after a couple of drinks, you're pretty strange, too."

Second timers and third timers were            . Susan asked for people attending their 100th thru 200th meetings. Fourteen were. This is Joe Mayhew's 31st WSFA anniversary.


Bob MacIncome announced that club dues are due and payable.

The learned Susan Cohen announced that she is now a history graduate student at the University of Maryland. Alternate history?

Joe Mayhew announced the sale of 2 and 1/2 boxes of books at $1 each.

Lance Oszko announced that Kristin Laven will appear at Wolf Trap 22-24 February.

Steve Smith announced that Mary Morman is looking for a synopsis of Star Trek 2.0 episodes: who, what, when, where, why, how many Data jokes, and so forth.

Mike Walsh is selling cheap books. Also, the Johns Hopkins press published a book entitled Staying Dry. A Newfoundland outlet requested a dozen copies of "Staying Hard". No wonder Canadians tell Newfie jokes.

The Johns Hopkins Continuing Studies program will include a course, "Science in Science Fiction", by Tom Disch. The course will include a field trip to Balticon. Specimens may be taken.

Steven Fetheroff finally found a book titled Alice in Jungleland. James Tiptree, Jr. discusses her family's walk across Africa.

Kent Bloom reviewed House Rules. Place empty cans in bags. A previous violation of this rule led to a minor disaster. The piano is off limits to stains. Drinks are downstairs. Have fun.

Dick Lynch, the Person to be Named Later, is also selling books.

The club applauded Cat Slusser for appearing. She offered archeology posters in return. She is Con Chair for the first Archeology Worldcon. Oooh.

The club unanimously adjourned at 9:44.

After the business meeting, ______ _____ and Lee Strong worked their curpals off transferring the official WSFA Publications Computer over to the Secretary, who has previously been          time on Government computers. Your tax dollars at work!


Book Review

Five hundred copies of Through Darkest Resnick with Gun and Camera were published by the Washington Science Fiction Association in honor of Mike Resnick's guest-of-honorship at the 1990 Disclave. It's a nice account of the African influences on Mike's work, along with the diaries of several of his African safaris, an invaluable amount of good advice (if you're thinking of such a safari yourself), excerpts from Adventures, Paradise, and Ivory, and two of his Kirinyaga stories. It's therefore essential for anyone who's trying to collect Resnick material.

Don't act surprised if you run into this one in paperback. Just grab it.

     -- Analog SF/SF
     Copyright Acknowledged

[Reprinted from Tom Easton's column in the February 1991 issue of Analog, page 182.]

Movie Review

Eve of Destruction

By an amusing coincidence, the trailer for Terminator 2: Judgement Day preceded the showing of Eve of Destruction. It's always good when a parent shows up to see a child off.

Eve's literary forebear is painfully obvious. This is mild entertainment of the semi-cyberpunk sort. Arnie is replaced by Renee Soutendijk in a dual role as renegade robot and confused creator. Eve Eight goes berserk while on a field trial and super-agent Gregory Hines has to hunt her/it down.

The characters aren't that bad. And the acting is pretty good. Soutendijk nicely distinguishes her roles with good body language. The scriptwriters developed a decent interplay of psychological and cybernetic forces to motive Eve Eight. Hines' character is less detailed but shows that a super-agent had vulnerabilities as well as strengths.

The plot, however, undoes good work by the characters. It's basically a chase movie with a moderate amount of blood and angst to liven things up. Despite a nuclear threat and a pointless change of scene from Northern California to New York City, the chase drags. It just never seems to rise above gore.

The logic seems flawed as well. As Hines remarks at several points, Why does a battlefield robot come without an off switch? Desert Storm's Patriots have self destruct switches, so why not Eve Eight? And the sexual situations struck me as cheap titillation rather than meaningful intimacy or even necessary to the plot.

I rate Eve of Destruction as Average.

Dune: An Early Draft

Our Sublime Padishah Emperor, Saddam I, has announced that his Sardaukar forces have repulsed nuisance raids launched by Fremen leader George Bushido. The Fremen seek to conquer Kuwait, the desert planet, and overthrow the rule of native Kuwaiti Governor Rabban Harkonnen. "Our Sardaukar are protected by our glorious Shield Wall defenses and are not threatened by ineffective ornithopter raids," said Palace spokesmen Hawt Alyur.

Kuwait is the source of the mysterious fluid, "oyle", on which Galactic civilization depends.

Military security prevents us from saying          .


Where Will It Stop?

"Ali Treiki for Libya proclaimed that the United States had celebrated U.N. Day by invading Grenada. 'Where will it stop?' he demanded."

     -- Mark Adkin
     Urgent Fury: The Battle for Grenada

"In the past 10 months, millions of Filipinos have joined a mushrooming new movement, whose aim to bind the U.S. and the Philippines more closely by making the island nation the 51st American state.

     -- Newsweek
     24 July 1972.

"A United Nations team investigating the U.S. invasion of Grenada was astonished to discover that a substantial number of Grenadans actually think that their nation should become the 51st state."

     -- Time magazine.

"One can imagine the consternation of the Good Samaritan if, returning from his trip, he found that the man he had helped was packed and ready to go home to live with him forever. Kind of how we feel on reading that President Endara says Panama would like to become the 51st state."

     -- National Review,
     September 17, 1990

Reacting to Japan's annexation of Mars and the Inner Asteroid Belt, Senator Fazir Ramadan, R-Irak, today introduced legislation to annex Mercury, Venus and the Jovan Subsystem to the United States. "It is obvious that President Mandella's policy of 'constructive engagement' has failed utterly," stated the Government Operations Committee member. "Congress ~ust take action before the Rising Sun rises over the entire Solar System."

Minority Leader Yeltsin, R-Muscovy, echoed Ramadan's call for swift action in creating 100 new space states.

Majority Leader Ortega, D-Nicaragua, promised that the Senate would take up Ramadan's bill in "good order".

Japanese ambassador Suzuki yesterday repeated Prime Minister Akhito's claims that Japan was merely reacting to U.S. actions in increasing the export price of oil to $1000 per barrel. "Since we cannot afford to continue paying prices set by the American oil sheiks, we must press ahead at full speed to develop solar energy satellites. The Belt offers the raw materials that the Empire needs."

In other news, the Senate Government Operations Committee again denied home rule to the District of Columbia.

     -- The Washington Post,
     27 Jan 2023


Twins, separated at birth, have been reunited through a common love of science fiction.

Thadeus and Lech Pilsudski were born to Ignatius and Maria Pilsudski on 1 April 1950 in Warsaw, Poland. The economically destitute family could not afford to keep both boys, and the Pilsudskis made the tearful decision to give up one son for adoption. Young Thadeus was sold to a band of passing gypsies for 40 zlotys and a goat. The gypsies discovered, however, that they could not feed the infant without the goat, and so they tearfully "sold the child to an American couple, George and Martha Schaad of Alexandria, Virginia for $1.25 in cash and a box of chocolate bars. Thadeus, renamed Tom Schaad, grew up as an American.

The brothers were reunited in September 1990 when Tom boarded the Polish tall ship Iskra for a Warsaw in '98 Worldcon Bid Party, and found the crew addressing him as their captain, Lech Pilsudski. FBI fingerprint czechs confirmed the brothers' identities in time for Christmas 1990.

Although separated by many miles, the two brothers' lives show amazing parallelism. Both enjoy Science Fiction: Tom is President of the Washington Science Fiction Association while Lech is President of the Warsaw Bid Central Committee. Both followed military careers: Tom is an officer in the U.S. Coast Guard while Lech is captain of the Iskra. And both are married to former beauty contest winners: Tom to Marianne Petrino, and Lech to former Miss Medium Industry, 1977, Rosa Kasmierz.

Tom Schaad, U.S. Coast Guard Lech Pilsudski, Polish Navy



Fast Forward Contemporary S.F.

Explore the fascinating world of contemporary science fiction each week with host John Pomeranz.

Arlington: Cable 33: Monday at 9 p.m. and Friday at 5 p.m.

Alexandria: Cable 10: Friday at 10 p.m.

Fairfax: Cable 38: Thursdayish at eightish i.e. irregularly


Required by Law

The WSFA Journal is the official newsletter of The Washington Science Fiction Association (WSFA), Inc. Copyright is the property of WSFA. Inc.


Publisher..............Tom Schaad
Editor-in-Chief........Lee Strong
Assistant Editors......John Sterling, Hazel Stone
Staff Artists..........Alexis Gilliland, Matt Leger, Joe Mayhew
Staff photographer.....Lance Oszko

                                              JANUARY 18, 1991


     It needs to be noted that the following figures
represents only those transactions conducted in 1990.


          DUES           $  375.00
          INTEREST          268.18
          WSFA PRESS      2,410.00
          DISCLAVE '88    7,791.33

          TOTAL REVENUE $10,844.51

          FIRST FRIDAYS     $  1,236.50
          THIRD FRIDAYS        1,164.79
          FIFTH FRIDAYS          269.96
          WSFA JOURNAL            92.02
          MISCELLANEOUS           25.00
          STORAGE AREA           660.00
          4TH OF JULY PIC.       158.85
          WSFA PRESS           4,128.24

          TOTAL EXPENSES    $  7,735.36


                            $  3,109.15




                                       Robert J. MacIntosh
                                       Treasurer, WSFA Inc.

File:   SHEPBOOK                                                       Page  11

INCOME FROM BOOK                      $13,343.63
COPYRIGHT EXPENSE                                        $20.00
CHARLES STREET GRAPHICS                               $4,879.25
MIKE WALSH EXPENSES                                     $853.40
COPY CAT PRINTING                                        $83.58
THOMSON-SHORE                                         $6,977.65
WALTER MILES- POSTAGE                                   $395.63
MARY-RITA BLUTE EXPENSES                                 $92.44
J.K. POTTER                                             $200.00
LUCIUS SHEPARD                                          $300.00

BOOKS REMAINING                        $1,620.00

TOTALS                                $14,963.63     $13,801.95


INCOME FROM BOOK                       $1,635.00
THOMSON-SHORE                                         $3,102.16
MIRAGE PRESS                                            $333.53
OTHER EXPENSES                                           $41.31
MIKE RESNICK                                          $1,750.00
TODD HAMILTON                                           $500.00

KNOWN BOOKS REMAINING                  $6,030.00
                                       $7,665.00      $5,727.00

Oh my god, it's........


What horrifying thing might happen at such an unlucky party? Nuclear war? Fire? Natural Disaster? No, worse than that

Tom turns 30!

Don't miss the disaster of the year. Join Tom Jewell, Paul Smith, Billy Padget, Katherine Putziger, and Maria Stroffolino as they throw the most horrifying ECLECTICON ever!

Fire protection provided by the volunteers of the West Lanham Hills Volunteer Fire Department.

As always, donations of food and drink gladly accepted.

February 9th, 1991
7:00pm till late.
[address censored]
Lanham, MD 20706
(301) 577-0823